The only absolute is that there are no absolutes. Oh, beloved confrontations with paradoxes! They’re everywhere. Some stand out like sore thumbs. Some hide themselves in the guise of tradition, and what better tradition to take cover in than the good ole fashioned traditional “family,” a group of people related to each other by blood or by marriage. A traditional family is supposed to be the tightest social circle we have, and why not? After all, brothers and sisters are bound to each other and their mothers and fathers by DNA.
“He looks just like his father!”
“She’s as stubborn as her mother”
And the similarities aren’t just confined to immediate relations.
“That Joey. You better watch him. He reminds me so much of our second cousin Mike, and you know what happened to him.”
“Oh, the Carters that live down the street. They’re such a nice family. Did you hear? Will got his medical license and is going to work in his father’s practice. He’s following in his father’s footsteps.”
When it comes to family, perfect symmetry is a metaphorical goal often sought. Take, for example, the common family portrait. Like paradoxes, they’re perched on mantlepieces and hanging in hallways everywhere. Rich or poor, large or small, families try their hardest to acquire a unifying stamp of identity, a single jigsaw-puzzle entity cobbled together with individuals. A typical family portrait will have mother and father in the background with children in front and the occasional uncle/aunt/grandparent wedged in somewhere in between. Everyone’s looking straight at the camera with something that resembles a smile. In many cases special clothing has been chosen to not only add an air of respectability, but to also further cement the union. The finished portrait provides viewers the fodder for reenforcing opinions and ear-candy comments.
Still, how many people spend hours staring at a portrait of those they see on an almost daily basis, and how much do the people in the portrait resemble their everyday, individual selves? Let the contradictions abound! Children don’t always grow up to follow their parents’ paths, and parents don’t always wish the same fate as their own for their children. The paradox hidden in the tradition family peeks its nose around the corner when we stop wanting to find our similarities and start recognizing our family members as the individuals they are.
So, what happens if you break apart and rearrange the pieces a little bit? What if, instead of a single traditional family portrait, you assemble a collage of individual portraits of each family member? What if the unifying factor is no longer physical in appearance, but abstract in subject matter? What if instead of seeing the faces you see everyday, you’re met with a foreground silhouette of the family member facing a background wall of what that family member thinks best represents him or her? Does it make for better understanding, or is it alienating?
These days, families aren’t always traditional. More and more often you don’t need to be related by blood or marriage to be considered someone’s family. Nor is it that case that the married and blood related family that stays together survives. Recognition of this while at first glance seems divisive, if mulled over might lay a stronger foundation of unity than unity for appearance sake only.
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Other notable takes on the theme
Tales of a Slightly Stressed Mother
Filed under: Photo Challenges Tagged: 2812 photography, Abstract, Family Portrait, paradox, Pete Rosos, photography, postaday, The Daily Post, traditional family, Weekly Photo Challenge, Wordpress
